Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
