Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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