There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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