Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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