I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Acid is not a monday night drug
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
