Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
