I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Randomize
