She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
