just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
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Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
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That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
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