Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
It's shark week go big or go home
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
