I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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