I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Randomize
