this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
