Me. At least after what I've been through.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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