she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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