sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
