He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
