girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
