once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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