Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
