Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize