Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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