Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
