Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
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