Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Randomize