I can't watch pbs sober anymore
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize