Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize