This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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