Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Randomize