You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
