we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
