she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
