At least make sure they are 18
Why
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
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