ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
