after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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