bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
