69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
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I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
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I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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