so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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