Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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