i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
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