I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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