I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Randomize
