You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
We are two peas in an std pod
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He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
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