Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers