There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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