just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
