when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
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