today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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