He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
These 19 People Had Awkward Celebrity Sex Dreams
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
These 27 People Had No Idea What They Were Doing When It Came To Sex
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do