Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize