you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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